- My tongue is permanently sewn to my cheek. This means please do not take anything I say seriously because I sure as hell don't. (Any statement about my lack of sincerity or concern always excludes food. I care deeply about food...deeply.) If you deem it appropriate to set my blog afire with your discontent, rest assured that I will not take you seriously either.
- I adore my family, and I kid because I love. And because they often do the most entertaining crap which I feel must be shared with the world. I mean...laughing alone sucks, right?
- I use words like 'Epic', 'Awesome', 'Fail', and 'Suck' like they are going out of style. Embrace them or GTFO. (For definitions of my slang, please consult urbandictionary.com....often.)
- I am not a professional...anything. Please do not consider anything on my blog advice of that nature. I do what works for me, I do what I have been taught, but ultimately you must use your best judgment. I freely admit that I do not know everything. (Please don't tell my husband)
- I don't give a damn. Seriously, I don't. About politics, race, religion, sexual preference, age, planetary affiliation, underpant usage...none of it. I have opinions about all of the above but they do not have a place on this blog. I might (read: will) rag on the state of parenting in this country, or the crappy food people eat. If that offends you well... I don't give a damn.
- I use an excessive amount of ellipses, commas and parenthesis. I like them.... that is all.
- 'Light' and 'Diet' will not make frequent appearances on this blog. My recipes are full on fat and sugar but please...exercise restraint and discretion.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
7 Things You Should Know Before Reading This Blog
This serves as my disclaimer from here till the end of time (which I have been told is next Wednesday). I just do not want anyone to have unrealistic expectations about who I am and what is going on here. So for the sake of utter clarity I felt the need to offer the following list.